I know everyone worries from time to time (if that's you, consider yourself lucky) but some of us, ahem...like myself, were gifted with the extraordinary talent to worry about every. single. thing.
I mean, everything.
I seem to be a pretty normal person on the inside...or so I'd like to think. I like to laugh, have a good time, show my sense of sarcasm and sometimes even make a fool of myself, but on the inside, I sometimes find myself to be a complete and utter mess. I am the absolute epitome of a worry wart and I've come to the realization that the older I get, the worse it becomes. (Thanks, mom.)
How bad do my roots really look? Does this outfit even make sense? What is this person going to think of me? Did I say the right thing? Did Beau make it to work in one piece? I know he's playing softball tonight...what if he falls in a hole and breaks something? Am I making the right career choice? Is Oakley alive at home by herself? What if she chokes on a toy? Or escapes from her kennel, eats an entire roll of toilet paper and her entire jar of treats and we have to have her stomach pumped? Is my mom doing okay? Is she happy? What about my brother? Did him and his fiance make it into work okay? Am I going to be able to make the mile run up to my gym and back without literally passing out, dying and being left for the coyotes? I left the Crockpot going when I left. Crap-the house is on fire. Again.
That last thought was real (as with 99% of the others). As I was sitting in Fire Warden Training this past week (Yes. Fire Warden Training. Yes. I'm a "Warden" now. And yes, I'm totally adding that to my qualifications on LinkedIn.) watching horrific videos of families losing entire homes, all I could think about was my Crockpot (on the lowest) setting, cooking our dinner for the night, causing a spark and starting a fire. As I watched these poor innocent people's homes become engulfed in flames, my mind just went wild. Absolutely out of control to the point of me just wanting to get up and leave to be sure my house, indeed, was not on fire. I know Oakley knows how to escape from her kennel but would she be able to get out and survive? Would the firefighters get to my house in time and be able to rescue her? What if the smoke detectors didn't go off for some reason and the firefighters never got called? Would a neighbor see the flames and make the call?
Granted some of these thoughts of mine are a little silly (okay-that last one is not silly) and even far-fetched but some...man, some are just downright deep.
How old will I be when I die? How will it happen? Will my family be okay? Have I let them know how much I truly love and care for them? What if when I get pregnant, something is seriously wrong with our baby? What if I can never get pregnant? Will I even make a good momma? What if something happens to Beau? Did my dad know how much we loved him when he died? What if our house really DOES ever catch on fire? Are we going to get robbed tonight? Is some whackjob going to come into my office building and blow the place up one day?
God forbid all of the above but these are real thoughts I've had on multiple occasions.
Have you ever thought about how much you actually worry about on a day-to-day basis? I know for me, it's probably not healthy. Let's be honest, y'all. It's a problem.
But it's real.
Though I try turning my worries into happy thoughts or even drop a quick line to the Man upstairs
Do you worry this much and about crazy things like I do? Has your house caught on fire like 16 times now? (Please tell me I'm not alone here.) What do you do when you worry? How do you keep yourself from going nuts with all these weird thoughts we face on a daily basis?!
Thank GOD for ^that^, right?
You are definitely NOT crazy! I have always been a little bit of a worrier too and then when I had a baby it became worse. I was scared to leave my house and take the baby for a walk because what if a coyote was SO hungry he followed us and then attacked us?! Ridiculous, right? Have a GREAT week!
ReplyDeleteI do the same thing. I just said to my husband last night- what if the house catches on fire while we are at work one day and the pups can't get out of their crates? I make him text me when he gets to work or else I worry all day that something happened. I totally understand what you are saying. Thanks for sharing this.
ReplyDeleteYou just posted about the inside of my head. You are definitely not alone. Actually, just last week I couldn't shake this feeling of unease. It's gone now but for about three days I called my family three times a day to make sure they were alive, I checked on the dogs constantly, and I made Josh call/text me when he got to work. I still don't know where that feeling was coming from but it wasn't fun.
ReplyDeleteI definitely worry like this too and it tends to be a downhill spiral. I start worrying about something little and then all of the worries start piling up and filling my brain until I am absolutely convinced something bad is about to happen. It is totally negative and something that I have to try really hard to avoid! You are not the only one!
ReplyDeleteUmmm let's say I am glad that I am NOT the only one like this!! It can be quite annoying sometimes, ha! It wears me out! I try not to worry but I can't help it. UGH! I'll pray for you, & you can pray for me ha
ReplyDeleteEchoing all the other ladies, you are NOT alone. I have indeed left work (20 minute commute by train) to make sure my straightener hadn't caught our apartment on fire AND walked back from the metro before going to work to make sure I blew out my candles. It was becoming so constant that I started having panic attacks that were so debilitating and made me not want to ever go out to eat or be anywhere where I could not lock myself in a room until "the uglies" subsided! I finally saw someone for it and on week 3 of a very light dose of anxiety medication. I am not advocating for this as a solution for you necessarily as I know it's not for everyone (and I am a strong believer in If God brings you to it, He will get you through it and tried to pray it away) but I think the medicine, plus prayer, has REALLY made life much better and more enjoyable. If it had just been me, I probably would not have taken anything but it started affecting my husband (making him constantly text/call me to let me know he was okay) and my parents and brothers. I describe it as just taking the edge off and makes you rationally get through the worries. They don't disappear all together, but I am not leaving work anymore ;)
ReplyDeletei'm huge worrier too. it's had a lot of negative effect on my life, i hate it. i try so hard to change but it's just who i am.
ReplyDeletei see the above comments relating also, so maybe it's just a female thing?? haha
I am such a worrier that I don't even consider trying to crockpot something if I'm not home, or leave the dryer running, or dishwasher, I always not only turn off my straight iron but unplug it, and lastly I am so weird about thinking I didn't shut the garage that at least once a week I get to the end of our subdivision and make myself turn around and drive by my house to make sure I did! Oy Vey! It never ends...
ReplyDeleteYou are definitely not alone! I'm a natural worrier but, things that have happened in my life have certainly enhanced it. The biggest thing is working at a police department for 6 years now. I am SUPER jaded at this point - trust no one, suspect everyone. It's horrible & it drives my husband crazy! I don't think of if it will happen I think of when it will happen. These days there's too many crazy people out there & crazy things randomly happen... it will happen, it's just a matter of time. UGH! Awful thinking right!? Thankfully I don't live in the same city I work for but, let me just say that I don't trust anyone at Wal-Mart & I fully expect my car to be broken into any time it's left in a parking lot somewhere! LOL!
ReplyDeleteOh girl, I'm am right there with you on this. I worry about something happening to my family and friends all the time. Will they make it to work safely, is their plane ride smooth, is webmd going to be my downfall? I have to force myself to take a time out and deep breaths.
ReplyDeletei am a total worrier. i literally always have a bag packed in case of a fire or some random disaster. (which is pretty normal around this time of year in san diego, it's fire season and we have blackouts.) i also will never have a crockpot since i am terrified i will burn down my house. also, my guy was on a trip this weekend out of cell service and i was freaking out all weekend. he came back and said "well we had a blow out on the freeway and got the truck stuck in sand 12 miles from the road." i am seriously tempted to buy him a satellite phone. full on panic attack mode.
ReplyDeleteOMG...I felt like I was reading a post about ME!! I am a HUGE worry wart and it has doubled since having a baby! I also left my crockpot on this morning with tonights dinner in it...great, now I am going to worry even more today that my house is on fire ;) I have no advice on how to calm your worry ways becuase I've never been able to calm mine. I have a husband who NEVER worries...so I just tell him I worry for the both of us.
ReplyDeleteGreat Post, I am the SAME way and worry about many of the same things you do. I am a worry wart to the extreme. Even though 99.9% of the things we worry about never happen...that doesnt make it any less exhausting! Cheers to prayers and less worrying!!
ReplyDeleteI basically worry constantly - unreasonably so - and especially about the dog. You are SOOO not alone in this!
ReplyDeleteI too have been "blessed" with the worry gene. Every morning I catch myself going into the bathroom at least three times double checking to make sure my straightener is unplugged (I just realized that makes me sound like a worrier mixed in with some OCD).
ReplyDeleteHa like every other commenter, you're not alone! Every time I cook something in the crockpot I think about it allllllll day long just wondering if our house is okay. And Huxley escaping his kennel and destroying the place or goodness anything really. Big ole worrier here. Those quotes/phrases are so true though and give it up to the man upstairs. There are so many bible verses that talk about how worthless worry is and how you should 'Feed your faith to starve your fears', rather than the other way around. Happy Monday friend! xo
ReplyDeleteBlah I am a major worrier and it drives me crazy!! Anytime I don't hear from my bf over an extended period of time I am convinced that he got in a car accident or someone hurt him in some way or any other bad thing I can think of that has to do with where he is. It stresses me out!
ReplyDeleteThat's how I feel when I'm not on my medication, I have ocd. Which basically means I am and obsessive compulsive worrier. Low dose of anti-depressants help me a LOT.
ReplyDeleteAh my Steph, this makes my heart sad. I wish I could take all your worries away - don't worry sweet girl, because everything is going to be alright... I don't know why but I am the complete opposite, I don't worry about much - even as a wife and mama!! I don't know if it's a good thing though, maybe we should meet somewhere in between?? x
ReplyDeleteThis is such a well written post that I can totally agree with. I worry about every single thing. We have our first little baby on the way and believe me, your mind goes into overdrive with worries!! I've always hoped it would get better as I got older, but mine too, has gotten worse!!
ReplyDeleteI love this post because I feel like I'm the same way! Sometimes I just let my worrying totally consume me and I can't let something go! But then I usually have a serious talk with myself (because duh, I talk to myself) and I just say Self, what if one of your worries actually came true? What if my house really did catch on fire? What would I do differently? What would I change? What would I do about it? And if there's something I'd actually do, I do it. If there's really no answer? Then I just get over it. I try really hard to accept things that I know I can't change. Easier said that done!
ReplyDeleteHuge worrier right here! I have learned to just take a deep breath and pray then try to find something to distract myself from all the crazies going through my head :)
ReplyDeleteI'm with you girlfriend. It's a serious problem and it started giving me really bad anxiety. I know what time my husband and gets off and if he doesn't call me within minutes, my mind goes crazy. I think way too far in advance sometimes and think of possible scenarios in my head. Like if I see someone walking by my office building, I immediately begin thinking he has a gun and what I would do if he came running in here with a gun. Crazy I tell ya. I actually quit giving Comet bones because he hides them and I'm scared he will find them when I'm not home and choke to death.
ReplyDeleteYou are NOT alone! Trust me. I worry about things all the time. There are nights when I seriously lay in bed for hours worrying about random stuff. I go over scenarios in my head over and over with all the different ways things could play out. My mom calls out of the blue and I as I answer I worry that something happened to someone and once we get off the phone (and everyone is fine) I go over how that conversation could have been totally different and what would I have done if it was. I wish it was something that I could easily stop, but I can't and it's driving me nuts. I found my first gray hair a few months ago, I'm sure it has something to do with all the crap I have going through my head. If you have any good ideas of how to shut them off... please share!!
ReplyDeleteP.S. Great post :-)
I don't think I've ever commented before, but i've been following you for a while. It's SO nice to know that I'm not alone in my constant worrying. I drive my hubby nuts :) I'm convinced people worry much more than years ago because of the instant access to the internet where you can find every crazy/scary story imaginable and the fact that we are all so connected with cell phones, etc. Before cell phones, I don't think people worried as much because they had no reason to think "WHY AREN'T THEY ANSWERING???!!" :) It's a blessing and a curse to be so connected and informed.
ReplyDeleteI feel like this post is my mind every.single.day!! I can definitely relate to worrying about the little things, did I lock the front door or my car? To the big things, is my family okay? What if something happens to them? I try not to worry but unfortunately can't help it! I agree that praying about it will help keep you sane. When my dad was sick, my mom gave me good advice by saying "Whatever's going to happen, will happen. Don't focus on the future, instead live for the moment. Don't worry about things now, because there's no reason to worry twice. You'll worry now and worry when something happens, and you're just wasting energy". I guess I try to live by that and just hope and pray that nothing horrible will happen. It's not easy though and definitely drives me crazy! Hope your worries can lessen a little :)
ReplyDeleteYou are not alone! I am constantly worrying about my house catching on fire and my puppy being stuck inside. My hubby thinks I am crazy, but I will not leave the house with anything on, including the crock pot, dishwasher, and dryer. Growing up, my street had two houses catch fire. One was burned to the ground and the other has a ton of damage on the inside. When my husband and I got an apartment together, our building caught on fire (luckily no damage to our actual apartment though). At any rate, I like to think the worry is justified.
ReplyDeleteI so relate to this. I worry about being late, how long Tilly is at home, if I'm too lazy, or if I should be doing more, especially in my classroom and sometimes I worry when I don't have enough to do...what?!! haha I swear that is the reason I have migraines at all. I have been trying to do something each night that calms or at least rests my worries. Surely it will help here soon right?!
ReplyDeleteI've totally been there done that. I got to the point that it seriously made me not even be able to function normally. It was so terrible. I went and seen a doctor and they diagnosed me with borderline OCD and put me on meds. It really has helped.
ReplyDeleteGreat post! A topic many people need to read. I'm worry all the time too, it's become worse as I get older and especially since I became a new mom. I know I must let God take over but that is one of the hardest things because society teaches against that. But God is the only thing that can help that worry. Prayer is definitely a must!
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